From Boxtops to Dead Skunks to Washboards - How My Mind Works

Please bear with me as I randomly rant through this post. This will give you all great insight into the way my mind works...

If you are a semi-regular reader of my blog you will may have noticed that I have requested my fellow bloggers to save their Boxtops for Education for a school in Gary where Mama Chep works. If you would like to read more about that click here.

ANYWAY.....Cheryl offered to help out the best way she could (she lives in the UK) by spreading the news through her blog (which if you haven't read - you should - she is always entertaining)

OK....This idea has caught on. I recieved a comment from 'Zilla tonight asking if she can also post on her blog about the Boxtop Challenge. Which by the way 'Z - if you are testing my skills on higher math - there is a reason I am holding back getting my Masters....;-)

SO....'Zilla asked me some questions to which I did not have the answers. Logically I call my mother. (Sidenote: It's 9:30 CST)

My father answers. He is groggy.

Papa Chep: Hello?
Chep: Hi Dad - you sleeping?
Papa Chep: Yes
Chep: It's 9:30. Is mom sleeping too?
(I just figured he was "staring at the back of his eyelids" on the couch)
Papa Chep: Yes
Chep: Why are you in bed so early?
Papa Chep: Your mother had a bad day today.
Chep: What happened?
(Thinking something went wrong with the demolition - yeah that's for another post)
Papa Chep: Your ma hit a dead animal on her way to work today.
Chep: Oh no. A dog? A cat?
Papa Chep: Nope it was **starts to sing** "A dead skunk in the middle of the road" You know that song?
Chep: UM - no - you have got to be making this up.
(My father can take most conversations and relate them to a song. He doesn't even make them up They are honest to goodness songs. It's a talent. I have also acquired this skill.)

Here is my father singin' is heart out! I love this photo!

**Conversation continues about the song Dead Skunk (yeah here's proof it exists)**

OK - If you are not already aware....I am an internet geek. I love to find things on the internet. Some say it's resourceful. I say - I'm a nerd. So I start my search. Must find more than just the lyrics. Must find song.

Found a midi. Boy - I had forgotten how badly those suck.

Continue to search...find other songs by Loudin Wainwright III.

Then I come across this treasure....The Washboard Wizards. These guys remind me of our family reunion band "The Nitty Gritty Dirty Underwear Band" (my Uncle Tim made up that one). Played the washbasin bass, the washboard, the spoons....you know...a backyard band. Made me a little nostalgic. Mama Chep - if you are reading this - make sure dad check's this out he may get into their music. Hard tellin' my dad listens to literally EVERYTHING.

So anyway - wanna know if I found the song? Hells yes I did. They don't call me the "Internet Geek" for nothin'.

Enjoy and goodnight!

It's my lucky number - so I had to!

Four Jobs:
Assistant Park Manager
Softball Umpire
Telephone Operator
Stage hand

Four Movies I Could Watch Over and Over
Animal House
Major League
Toy Story
Braveheart

Four Places I've Lived:
Lowell, Indiana
Bloomington, Indiana
Hobart, Indiana
Cedar Rapids, Iowa

**Can you say boring midwest girl**

Four TV Shows I Love to Watch:
2 and 1/2 Men
24
Numbers
Criminal Minds

Four Places I've been on Vacation:
Virginia Beach, VA
Nestor Falls, ON Canada
St. Mary's, PA
Orlando, FL

Four Websites You Visit Daily:
Yahoo Mail
E-Bay.com
KGAN.com
Various Blog sites

Four of My Favorite Foods:
Ribeye
Crab legs
Sushi
Anything SPICY!

Four Places I'd Rather Be:
Fishing
In Canada Fishing
On Vacation
Chillin with my girls WM and Kelscraggly

Four Albums I Can't Live Without
Barenaked Ladies - Gordon
Barenaked Ladies - Everything for Everyone
Barenaked Ladies - Greatest Hits Vol. 1
Aerosmith - OH YEAH!

I won't tag - but I'll offer it to anyone interested!
Comment and let me know you posted!

Chepner's Boxtop Challenge

As you all know I am from the "Armpit of America". My mom, (bless her heart) still teaches 7th and 8th grade science there - Gary, Indiana to be exact.

If you are unfamiliar with the area here are a few interesting facts about Gary, Indiana:

The median income in the city:
Household: $27,195
Family is $32,205.
25.8% of the population and 22.2% of families are below the poverty line.
Information from Wikipedia

72% of the student population is eligible for reduced or free lunches.
Information from Great Schools.net

As you might notice the majority of the students at Mama Chep's school don't have a lot of money. The city also doesn't have a lot of money, therefore the schools are lacking in funds.

Boxtops for Education is a wonderful program that awards schools money to spend on necessary items. Schools can earn up to $20,000 from the box top program. Lake Ridge Elementary (where Mama Chep works) only earned $544 last year.

In order to increase participation in the program the school holds a contest 2 times each year. The homeroom that collects the most boxtops wins a much needed prize. A healthy breakfast.

Mama Chep likes to win. She asked me to do what I could to collect boxtops for her students.

SO - if you don't already collect boxtops for a school - please send your boxtops to the post office box at the end of the post and I will be sure she gets them. It's a free way to help a school in need.

You can find boxtops on hundreds of items. You can click here for a list.

I have saved 32 so far....who can beat me??

Chepner's Boxtop Challenge
PO Box 9792
Cedar Rapids, IA 52404

Trivia About Chep

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Colleen !

1. Women shoplift four times more frequently than Colleen .
2. Some birds use Colleen to orientate themselves during migration!
3. The difference between Colleen and a village is that Colleen does not have a church.
4. Grapes explode if you put them inside Colleen .
5. Four-fifths of the surface of Colleen is covered in water!
6. US gold coins used to say 'In Colleen we trust'!
7. Most bottles and jars contain at least twenty-five percent recycled Colleen .
8. In Eastern Africa you can buy beer brewed from Colleen .
9. About 100 people choke to death on Colleen each year!
10. The military salute is a motion that evolved from medieval times, when knights in armour raised their visors to reveal Colleen !

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/trivia.pl" method="get" style="background-color:#5F5F42;color:#CFCF95;padding:4px;text-align:center">I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

A little late...

I should have added this link at the end of my Holiday road trip blog.

You lookin' for a laugh? Click here.

OH yeah....it's true only Illinois is worse....

The Friday night hunt....

Hola!

Last night - after Mexican and Margaritas - my husband and I went to Target for a few needed items. Somehow each time we go there we end up in the toy department. This is usually not a problem. We wander around looking for toys to buy WM's kids (can never decide on one) and then purchase the necessary items.

This however was not one of those trips. Last night's trip started a 3 store search.

For all you Star Wars fans - for all you Transformer fans - THIS is the ultimate toy.













They had ONE at each store. Well the back of the box said collect all 4 - so we just HAD to find them all.... Boys and their toys....whatever will I do with him.

In Memory...

Five years ago this week we lost a shooting star.

January 14, 2001 Mr. Chep's brother, M was lost in a terrible accident while aboard a cruise to the western carribean.

M was on a cruise with his girlfriend and her family. After a fight out on the cruise deck, M climbed over the railing and couldn't get back. He fell from the 4th highest deck of the ship into the water. He was found an hour later floating unconcious in the water and died at 6:45am at Tampa General hospital. He was 19.

M was the brother I never had. M told me storied about Mr. Chep's childhood that made me laugh. When M smiled - you had to smile.

Just before M went on the cruise with his girlfriend he had decided to leave ISU and come back to live at home and attend a college here in town. It was going to be a chance for M and I to really get to know each other. I never had that chance.

During the first few years of our courtship/marriage M was in high school busy with his friends, sports and just being a teenager. He escaped serious injury numerous times in his short life - many while in high school. When M graduated, we all moved to Iowa to be with Mr. Chep's dad. M went off to college - and 6 months later he was gone.

M still lives in all the people he touched. His smile could light a room - and when I need a little "push" I often think of him and what he might do. He was like most young men - unsure of what he wanted - but he did know this. He loved his family and his life. The life he led was short - but full. It was this experience that taught me to live in every moment as if it were your last - because you never know when it's your time.

I love and miss you M.

Feeding the hungry that refuse to eat - but are still picky....

As the Academic Administrative Assistant one of my duties is to order food for various occasions. The first Friday of every month we hold a communications meeting. The first 1/2 hour of this meeting is breakfast. Normally this is a minor task - that only consists of me deciding - eggs and bacon or french toast and juice. This week that very task is frightening to me. FRIGHTENING.

I know, I know 'You can please some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time.' Hell - half the time I hear half the people complaining about FREE food. This alone baffles me - and annoys me at the same time.

In a previous post you may have read that there is a "Biggest Loser" challenge going on at work. I, in my infinate wisdom, chose NOT to participate in this event. I am however aware of the various diets that people will try in order to lose weight. A few of my favorites are:

Atkins: We have ALL heard of the meat, cheese and veggie diet. I know at least one person at work that is going to take this approach. I tried this once - I about broke the bank trying to maintain this diet - not to mention the lack of caffine made me unbearable and my husband FORCED a Diet Coke in my hand a MADE me drink it. He hated me during that week.

South Beach: A healthy version of the Atkins diet. If I was to TRY a "formal" diet - this may actually be it.

Weight Watchers: Point value weight loss system. Great idea for people that don't like to change their diets and just want to watch their intake.

The Master Cleanse/Lemon Diet: If you haven't heard of this diet - you may be shocked at what people do to "cleanse" their bodies. For 10 days people drink nothing but a mixture of water, cayenne pepper, lemon juice and maple syrup. Yeah if you think you read that wrong - read it again. You will find you read it right. All I have to say it NASTY.

OK - at least 3 of these diets are being represented during the "Biggest Loser" contest at work. Have you ever tried to feed a bunch of cranky ass people during the first week of their diet? They keep asking me "What are we having?" "Can we have no carbs?" "Can we have low fat?" I went to the President of the college and asked her "Do we have to feed these people?" She said - "Yes we should" - but that very same question came to her mind - WHAT DO WE FEED THESE PEOPLE?

We made an executive decision to feed them breakfast casserole and fruit.

I wanted to get Krispy Kremes - funny - not many saw the humor in that. Shame.

Happy Birthday to me....

Nope - not my birthday...but we booked our birthday trip.

We will be heading to Nestor Falls, ON May 27th - June 3rd! We will be staying at the Arrowhead Resort and Motel a little, out of the way place owned by my friend's Aunt and Uncle.

This is the 2nd fishing trip we have made across the border - so we are better educated and ready to bring home a boat load of fish!

Mr. Chep has already started watching the fishing shows this morning - the man has the mid winter itch!

Here are some photos from our last trip to Canada. ENJOY!

The Biggest Loser

People at work have decided it would be a good idea to get a weight loss challenge going at work. I was approached numerous times to see if I was interested in playing along.

HHMMM pay $5 to lose weight. Nah - I think not. No, $5 isn't a lof of money. No, I don't like the extra weight - but I do LIKE me. I know that losing a few pounds won't make me work better or make me happier so why suffer to be a few pounds lighter. I resolved a few months ago that I would eat better - which I have done - but I am not going to make myself miserable trying to win a few bucks. If only I would exercise a little more...that's what I really need. If $5 bucks me into a gym - I would be on it in a minute!

It's not that I don't need to lose weight - (I do which is why they all asked I am sure) but giving someone $5 to join a team to maybe win a few bucks....I think I may have better luck winning the lottery.

What did I tell them when they asked?

"Sorry - I plan on GAINING weight this term."

Hey everytime I work at losing weight I gain it. I figure if I plan on gaining it - maybe I will lose.

Odorific

The other day while shopping for moisturizer at a store famous for scented personal care products, I decided to venture out from my normal "flavors" and try a new scent. When I used this new scent today after my shower Mr. Chep commented on the odor. He told me that it "smelled bad". Hm. Guess Mr. Chep doesn't like Brown Sugar and Fig.

It baffles me what attracts people to certain smells. If someone were to ask me what my favorite smell is I would quickly answer "fresh cut grass". Would I be attracted to a man that smells like a LawnBoy? Probably not. Would anyone? Well maybe occasionally - but not as an everyday smell.

Instead - men wear things that are musky, wood scented, mountain springs...you get the idea- manly. Women - we wear fruits and flowers - probably not on the top of a man's favorite scent list. So where do lotion/perfume companies come up with with their ideas for scents? Never in a million years would I think to wear Brown Sugar and Fig. Guess I will never wear it again.

New Years Eve Hook-up of Mr. and Mrs. Chep

Eight years ago on New Years Eve I was "reaquainted" with Mr. Chep. Here's the story of how it happened....

It started back in NWIN when I worked for the parks department. I had moved into the on site apartment a few months prior - and my best friend from high school "Fucko" (you may have read about him in Kelscraggly's post "Take The Good Things From Every Relationship") had just gotten divorced and needed a place to stay - he moved the night before.

Being young - in a crappy apartment that was not my own - we decided to throw a party. All we needed now was guests.

Fucko called his friend in Indianapolis, I called our friends H & M and since my sister (K) was home from BSU for Christmas break I called her. She said she would think about it and let me know later. (She's a social butterfly - she had options unlike my created one!)

According to Mr. Chep - K called him up and asked him if he wanted to go to a bar. Mr. Chep (being the honest and logical person that he is) said:

• Mr. C: I can't K - you know I'm not 21 until May
• K: But I know the bouncer I can get us in!
• Mr. C: I don't want to take that chance - you have any other ideas?
• K: My sister is having a party at her new apartment.
• Mr. C: That sounds like fun - I'll even drive.
• K: OK

Fucko and I had purchased 3 cases of beer and made several dozen jello shots.
The next morning it was all gone (minus the cube tray full of jello shots made sometime during the night)

The events of the night are fuzzy. Even to this day. There are a few things I DO remember.

1. My sister asked everyone "Are you a cop?" (Wee bit paranoid I'd say)
2. I dumped Jell-o shots down Mr. Chep's back onto his favorite Hard Rock t-shirt (he still has it)
3. Mr. Chep and I discussed me coming down to West Lafayette to visit Wolf Park when it got nice.
4. I gave Mr. Chep my number and e-mail that night.
5. I vaguely recall kissing Mr. Chep at midnight.

The rest is still fuzzy. We all woke up and felt the after effects of the beer. (I had one bathroom - Green Apple candles will never smell the same again)

A, Mr. Chep, K, Mrs. Chep, Mimi & Heath - not the best photo - but fun to share!

**If you look closely we had a 27" TV on top of a retro 25" console TV. NOPE not a redneck - the console actuallty worked!**

Then we all went and had pancakes.

What happens next you ask? Tune in - it will follow the actual timeline - so look for the next installment sometime later this month!

Have a Happy New Year!

For Zilla

I promised you my mom's trees when I got back - so here they are!

Enjoy!

My Favorite Christmas Photos

This is my mother-in-law and Pepper - aren't they cute??

My sister and Pepper wearing the hat she gave her (dog isn't very happy)

Scuba Santa at the Newport, KY Aquarium

Weird Habits

I've been tagged by Kelscraggly!

Ground Rules: The first player of this game posts his or her 5 Weird Habits, then chooses 5 people to tag by listing their names at the end.

Weird Habit Number 1: I NEVER use flesh colored bandaids. It grosses me out. I am probably the only 31 year old human out there that would rather wear a Daffy Duck bandaid then one that matches my own skin. It irritates my husband because I don't allow him to wear them either. (He uses liquid bandaid or Duct Tape bandaids - makes him feel all manly)

Weird Habit Number 2: I smack my lips like an old person looking for their teeth when I'm tired.

Weird Habit Number 3: Before I leave work I must clean my desk so I don't come to work surrounded by clutter. It helps me focus at the start of the day.

Weird Habit Number 4: I, too bite my lip...usually when I'm thinking or off in la-la land. (OK copied this from Kelscraggly because I do it more than I should. I get it from my mother)

Weird Habit Number 5: I have plastic gloves in my kitchen to use when I am handling raw meat of any kind. (Oh yeah and I also use them when I am working with my hands on anything - so YUP that caramel I made you Writermom is germ free!)

OK I am running out of people to "tag" so I am tagging Segue - again - in case he didn't notice Kelscraggly's!

Home again.....

36 Hours ago I returned home from our 5 state holiday tour and I am already back at work. My house is a disaster. We are talking hard core pit. I am praying that Mr. Chep will find the energy to clean it today (he is off until next Tuesday).

It was great seeing all the family - but the highlight was lunch in Plainfield with Writermom, Dental Dad, Jack and Pickles. I hated leaving them (no this does not mean I am moving back to Indiana. Kelscraggly so put your knife down). I sure do miss you guys!

My laptop was being uncooperative last night which is why I hadn't posted last night. Hopefully I can tell my Christmas stories a little later.

The Holiday Triangle

Tomorrow after I get off work starts the holiday travel. It's going to be a long weekend full of fulfilling visits - we are looking forward to the people - but not the drive.

In case your curious - 1057 miles in 5 days.

For the really curious: 16 miles/gal - approximately $145 in gas. Times like now I wish we had an economy car (not that Brad would even think about driving it at 6'5")

Due to the high cost of gas we decided to do Christmas in one big loop. Sounds like a good idea now...I will let you know how it goes when I get back. I already have an idea of how the start of all of this will go. Grandma called today. Don't get me wrong - I love my Grandmother but if I didn't know better I would think she was Jewish.

Gram (who rarely calls): I got your Christmas card today! I see you are spending Christmas in Kentucky - how are you going to get your presents from me?

Chep: Well, I don't know (loaded questions suck) - we are going to be in NWIN on the 23rd.

Gram: So how will you be travelling? What road do you take?

Chep: Well we go through Joliet on 53 and take the back roads.

Gram: Will you be on US30 at all? (Gram lives about 10 miles south of US 30)

Chep: No - we take 53 and then some other roads I am not sure about - it's all farmland.

Gram: Well can you take I-80 to US30?

Chep: Well - we COULD but the traffic is terrible. We avoid that area as much as possible.

Gram: Oh really?

Chep: Yeah - as soon as you get to Joliet it gets bad - and when you get to the bottlenecks just south of Chicago it's TERRIBLE.

Gram: Well......what time you going to arrive - what is it like a 3.5 hour drive

Chep: More like 4pm

Gram: Well you sure you are not going to go through St. John?

Chep: No Gram - the way we take dumps us out right in Lowell.

Gram: Well I guess I could come down to your mom's and see you there (Guilt, guilt, guilt)

Chep: That would be really nice!

Gram: Well I guess I will see you tomorrow at your mom's.

Chep: Great! See you there!

I decided NOT to give into this guilt trip. I am already traveling 357 miles just to get to my mom's house - and we don't get to spend much time with her as it is - so Gram will just have to come visit mom's. **OH yeah Mom and dad live 15 minutes south of Gram***

The round trip is a new thing this year - as we are not flying to KY as we have in years past. Let's pray for good weather - last year for Thanksgiving we got stuck going to KY on I-74. It was a mess - southerners don't do snow - (or shall I say do snow well).

Have a safe and Happy Holidays - I'll be back after the road trip!

C-ya!

It came today!!!

It came today!
It came today!

I mentioned to my husband that some people were waiting to open their gifts until Christmas Eve.

Since we are leaving early for the holidays (Thursday) I decided that I would open mine now.

He decided that wouldn't be appropriate If other people had to wait then I had to wait. Therefore he tried to hold it hostage.
I threatened to hold something else hostage if he didn't get it down from the top of the closet.

Needless to say I got my wish.

And I opened my package.

And to my surpise I got this beautiful (and artistic I might add) needlepoint! It is awesome! I love it!

I am going to hang it on my tree for now and then find a nice place for it in my house. If only the sender would have given me their name!!

Any way - thank you "Santa"!

**PS took me a minute to figure out how on earth my Secret Santa knew my nickname was "Chep" Guess I forgot I refer to myself as "Chep" on occasion!**

I saved a life.....

Yeah you read it right boys and girls....I - Colleen "Chepner" Hepner saved a life today.
Nope didn't push someone out of the path of a moving bus or revive someone using CPR.
I gave blood.
I didn't like it.

I commend those that can give blood and do so often. It's a good cause and I think that everyone that is able - does so at least once in their lifetime. I did it. I'm done.
When they announced the idea of a blood drive at the college I decided this was a great idea - but not for me.

When I asked for an article for the person that was planning the drive this is how it went down:

Chep: Hey M - can you write me an article about the blood drive?
M: Sure - it'll cost ya.
**uh oh - I feel a bribe coming on**

Chep: So what are we talking here? I just need a few paragraphs.
M: GREAT! I just need 1 pint.
Chep: Great when you want that beer?
M: Not beer - blood.
**oh shit - I hate needles**

Chep: I pass out when I get blood drawn. I don't think so.
M: You'll be fine- you want that article don't you?
**shit I don't have time to write an article**

Chep: Fine. I'll do it. But if I pass out you are to blame.

**Day of the blood drive**
1:45PM - my assigned time to give. I arrive. I wait (yeah this helps with anxiety)
2:00PM - answer a BILLION questions about my health (have you had sex with a man that has had sex with a man - ?)
2:15PM - sit down - Turbo (my blood drawing girl) sits me down and preps me to draw my blood. I warn her of my fainting issues. This phases her little.
2:20PM - Blood...woozy....I think I might faint.....
2:45PM - Coworkers come in to tease me about having a barf bag at my side....
3:00PM - Still laying on the cot after having my blood drawn....
4:00PM - Still being teased about passing out....

I think next time I'll just be Charlie Corpuscle!

A Chepner Christmas Challenge.

OK - it's a short post today - once I have things back under control I will get more online - but for today it's a brief one.

I've noticed people posting nice pictures of their pretty trees and their sentimental ornaments. To be honest - my tree isn't all that pretty. I do however have some interesting ornaments.

Take these 2 for example. The top ornament was one of my yearly gifts from my mother. It's a sketch of the high school she went to and the middle school I went to. It always makes me think of home. Kind of like the one below it. Kelscraggly picked this up for me when she lived in Virginia Beach. Mr. Chep and I went to visit her there and pulling out that ornament makes me think of fresh fish and sand between my toes. AAHHH to have a little warmth now....


OK this one is a little blurry - for that I apologize. BUT - I think you can all figure out the "ornament" on the left. Yes I do believe my Straub beer cap will take the cake for the most unusual item on a Christmas tree. Think you can beat that? BRING IT ON!

There is a story behind the beer cap and the coal miner on the right. Each was picked up on our honeymoon.

My mother taught me a nifty little trick to remind yourself of your travels....pick up an ornament. Well - I didn't think of this on our honeymoon. BUT - we did visit a brewery in PA so I drilled a hole in a beer cap and hung it with some string. Not fancy - not pretty - BUT - I think of fresh beer off the Straub line at 8am and the fine people of St. Mary's, PA each time I put this on the tree. ;-)

So I challenge you all - to find an odd ornament and share it with all of us - can YOU beat my beer cap?