Tuesday, November 15, 2005

What the.......???

Sorry it has been so long - I have been fighting with Adobe to get this posted.

Some of you may be looking at the photo and thinking...WTH?

It all started on Sunday morning.

10:30AM. Phone rings. It's my mother.

Chep's Mom: I waited as long as I could to call. Is everything alright????

Chep: Yes - why??

Chep's Mom: The tornados in Iowa - we were so worried about you out there!

**WTH? The tornado hit like 1.5 hours from our home but she is not from Iowa - so I let it go**

Chep: Thanks - mom - but we are fine - the tornado was like 1.5 hrs away. So what's new?

Chep's Mom: Well your father - he's at mass performing again (my dad plays the harmonica with the choir....don't ask)

Chep: That's nice - so what else?

Chep's Mom: OH! I have decided that I am going to hang Virgin Mary upside down in the window.

**WTH??** This obviously requires a follow-up - so I bite:

Chep: OK.....WHY?

Chep's Mom: Well I heard that if you hang the Virgin Mary upside down in your window then the person you pray for will become pregnant!

**Oh yeah - I am 31 with no children - and my mother desperately wants grandchildren**

Chep: So is this a proven thing? Have you heard others speak of this?

Chep's Mom: Oh yeah - there were a couple of ladies that said they heard that too.

Chep: OK....so will it work if you do it?

Chep's Mom: YEAH! OH and now I am counting on you to screw your brains out OK?

Chep: I am aware of how it works *change subject VERY QUICKLY*


You notice I didn't totally freak out and make a big deal about my mother's statement. This is because this is the same woman that shortly after our honeymoon we went to her house to swim. She announced very loudly that she and dad were leaving for awhile and that they would turn off the light outside if we wanted to "swim" *WINK*


Anyway - I am fully expecting to arrive at my mom's on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving to see Virgin Mary upside down in the window and for my mother to explain it to all that ask.

And you all wonder why I am the way I am.

Cat's outta the bag!


Writer Mom said...

Does this represent using gravity to help the boys swim better? Or is it an invitation to God for immaculate conception. You know, stick the legs up towards heaven as if to say...'Give it to me, Daddy!'

Just wondering how this came about...the thought process behind it.

*Dear Lord...don't take these smart ass comments out on Chep...If you're going to withhold pregnancy...let it be me!
(I'm probably knock up now. I'm gonna shut up.)

Anybody have some tips for Chep?

kelscraggly said...

I'm just so glad YOU didn't turn out like your mother!!! You can come to my house for Thanksgiving...we're just having the traditional turkey. No upsidedown Virgin Mary's allowed, unless it's praying for the Colts to win!!!

fineartist said...

Hand me the phone…I’m calling Chep’s mom. I want to thank her for the way you are Chep! I like the way you roll. Xxx, Lori

Matt said...

LOL this story gave me a laugh... stay warm out there in snowy Iowa!!

zilla said...

Hilarious! Man, every time I called my mother to tell her I was pregnant she responded as if I had told her I'd been diagnosed with cancer. She's probably got right-side-up virgins in all of her windows, too. Okay, Chep. I'm keeping this short because I know you & Mr. Chep need to get "busy."

::flips lights off, winks...

Cheryl said...

Wow. Well theres nothing like knowing how much Mom is relying on you, to relax you and get you in the mood........

Good grief.
Poor you!

UK--RAIN GENIE said...

This story is great, and the picture would not have been the same without the ripe pears... your mom sounds a lot like mine, she had me when she was 22, which means I am already 2 yrs late and birthing noone fast!!

The Jamoker said...

good grief is right.